Thursday, January 26, 2017

Building a phone app in Swedish? (dream)

Picture at

I drive to a grocery store. Using my car's windshield, I start using a quick, drag-n-drop builder in order to create an app. The challenge is in that the builder is in Swedish. I have to do searches for Swedish words as I go and both the process and I are incredibly slow.

I've parked in front of a bunch of flowers. I'm waiting for someone inside to finish.

I get tired of waiting, so I go inside. I see who I've been waiting for: myself. I see myself sitting at a craps table getting my fortune told. I don't know why I'm wasting my time like this. I don't see what I hope to gain. I'm pretty sure I'm going to get vague, generalized predictions about my future regarding things that could apply to nearly anyone.

There's a woman dressed like a shill standing next to the table. She turns cards over from a large deck. The two women interpret each card as different possible futures. Each card has a kitten on it with a different silly, cute pose. I like kittens. Who doesn't like kittens? So I stand beside myself and partake in the fortune teller's tarot game.


I do not speak Swedish. I have never programmed an app either. I am, however, partially Scandanavian. I recently took a commercial DNA test and learned more about my various racial divisions. I had a couple of surprises!

Nothing was more surprising than the test result stating that I'm slightly Jewish. I was surprised to feel a little bit afraid of the information.... like it was a secret I should have kept for my own safety, even though it's 2017 and I live in the United States. Perhaps that's why there are two of me in the dream: I self-identify as multi-racial and can pass for several different ethnicities. I hate having to choose other options or to choose just one option on demographic-collecting-forms and such.

I think it would be nice to program an app for android when I get more of my ducks in a row. I don't think anyone is going to care about it, but that's not important. I thought it would be fun to make a choose your own adventure love story. I've also been wishing that I could make a tarot deck! The pictures on tarot decks are usually very interesting. The archetypes in each card provide fertile ground for creative imagery.

Saturday, January 14, 2017

Losing a very important ring in a department store shower. (dream)

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I'm going through racks and racks of clothing in a very posh department store until I find a very special ring. The ring has triangular shards of blue coating the silver band. This is my ring, or rather, my parents' and ancestors' ring. I don't know what it could be doing here. I know I have to take it with me, but wouldn't that be stealing? I definitely didn't bring it in with me. I also don't think I can just go up to a clerk and explain the situation.

I take the ring with me as I pass through the racks and racks of clothing and bring the ring into a wooden shower in the store's bathroom and leave it there. It's not in the store for sale anymore, but is a lost item. I don't know if this will help me retrieve it. I can't stand the thought of someone else keeping what belongs to my family.

I shop around a little more, planning to go back, and then go try on some clothing in the same area. A blonde woman dressed in gold sequins is wearing it. She's changed it from a bluish labradorite to gold.

I can't believe someone would have the nerve to steal a ring sitting there in the bathroom! It can't have special significance to her family and mine. She must not have even liked the ring much if she decided to change it.

I exchange glances with her and smile, and I forget the importance of taking back the ring.

She can have it, I think to myself. I go back to shopping for clothing.


I have a yearning to positively affect other people with stories from my life. But I struggle to decide how much I should and shouldn't share in public about my personal life and what the best way to go about it is. The dream reflected a sense of not having a choice about the ring, not coming in with it, not being able to leave without it, watching it transform, surprise at seeing it, and having no choice as to how it's perceived and received by others. I feel that this is how the events of life unfold.

Saturday, January 7, 2017

Dreaming about baby snakes and voles because of Star Trek. (dream)

Every now and then, I freak out about life in general due to multiple stressors that happen in time intervals that are too short for me to adapt to. Right now, I'm freaking out about an increase in my rent and the loss of a couple really important sources of income. I'm happy to say that I'm no longer freaking out about my cat's death because she has made a miraculous recovery. Nothing matters more to me than that recovery. But now that the core problem I've been facing has been solved, I look up and see that I have a handful of other problems to face.

It seems that no matter what, I keep on dreaming about Deep Space Nine. Even this dream about anorexic baby snakes that I need to take care of while living in my parents' house was about feeding snakes voles that overran the snake rack system. That was directly from an episode in season 2 in which Cardassian voles were eating the ship.

I've been listening to Joseph Campell's Hero of a Thousand Faces in which he compiles myths from dozens of cultures and shows us what they all have in common. I was listening to one about hell fire and brimstone. He juxtaposes troll-like fury, death and sin and the distress arising out of the phenomenon of our existence with a sense of nourishing enchantment about life and death. I happened to be in the grocery store looking at a tabloid when I was listening to this part of the audio book and I thought, "He has human nature down pat in this regard. We've never changed." It's incredible how repetitive and simple we as humans are despite any amount of knowledge that comes to us.

A yellow, banana Californian king snake is hungry. He's medium-sized. I look down and see that I must have already taken care of some of the voles that have overrun the system. The voles have been bagged. They've been frozen and are now thawing. That should've taken care of any parasites. The only worry now is whether or not the meat has rotted and the snake will throw it back up. I can't remember how long ago the voles were killed, frozen or thawed.

I dangle one for the snake. It opens its mouth and takes it. Its color is unusual. There are gray stripes where it's ordinarily black. It's hypomelanistic, but its eyes are black. It strikes the large vole and begins to eat it, head first. It doesn't spit it back out.

Two days in a row afterwards, I dreamed about Cardassians. I dreamed about anger and forgiveness: the expression of it; feeling guilt and passion and wanting to evade feelings of vulnerability.

Whatever I watch the day beforehand is what I dream about now. I can't remember ever dreaming so consistently about a television show. The one-on-one relationships are by far the best part of the show, or any Star Trek show for that matter. I can't say that's true of many other series. Harry Potter is amazing due to the crisp, simple language describing complex, imaginative worlds and the soaring, child-like wonder of exploring them. Star Wars is good because of its strict adherence to the monomyth, bringing us to a sense of our own hero's journey, and its clear cut right versus wrong mantra. But these one-on-one relationships in Star Trek are unique. I wonder why people attribute its success to its adherence to technical jargon. That just seems to be a natural outgrowth or a basic requirement.