Sunday, July 30, 2023

I fail to perform as Marie Antoinette. (dream)

Image by Midjourney


DREAM

I'm in a large, office-like room with white walls. There are banquet tables covered with white tablecloths arranged in a large square in the middle of the room. 

I'm walking around a large square while pushing an SUV-like a baby stroller. And I'm practicing a song. I'm doing most of it wrong, but at least I can be right about one or two little things written on the paper if I practice. 

But the time comes to perform, and I haven't practiced enough. I know it too, but I put on my costume--a Marie Antoinette costume. I struggle with my tall hair. 

We parade around the square, performing for an audience that has arrived. A projector in the middle provides video and audio to accompany our live performance. 

Then it's my turn to sing. I don't remember all the lyrics, so I get out the printed lyrics for Marie's song. They're on a printed receipt. 

I can't find my place! The music plays, and I search, and search, and search for the current place in the lyrics, but I can't find them! The music stops. My chance to show what I can do is over. I never found the right lyrics. 


INTERPRETATION

I think this is me worrying about aging, and having additional responsibilities, but never finding my place in terms of what I'm supposed to do for the outside world. I'm still looking for work--satisfying work. Work that fulfills a spiritual need. I'm still trying to decide what I really want to do. It's a decision only I can make. Sometimes, people will feel entitled to butt in, but I just keep doing my own thing. But will I miss my chance to perform? 

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