Image by Midjourney
DREAM
I'm in bed. It's winter. I'm watching TV.
I don't notice my cat until he has clung to the side of my thigh for dear life. He's wrapped tight and I love him. My mom says she bets I haven't even fed the cats. This offends me. It's like she's saying I'm a bad cat mom. I say it's only 5 a.m. She says she feeds them at 4 a.m. I get out of bed.
I live in a mansion with red carpeting. I go down the hall and banter with a servant who hands me a bucket of food. I go to the fireplace and mix 3 different kinds of wet cat food together as the cats swirl around me. The food looks odd. It's very gelatinous. I consider why this might be. Is this just a new style of cat food I'm unfamiliar with?
I have dumped and mixed the food in the cats' bowls when two other servants approach with a large pleather cloth stretched out between them. I stand and allow them to dress me in it. It's a bright red snakeskin dress that hugs my curves.
My husband sees, and he tries to undress me. My husband is doughy, middle aged and lumpy. I am disgusted by his advances.
He's hurt, but accepts it.
I leave and see what looks like a small horn on my foot with a little sea fan on top. It looks like an ocean coral. I take tweezers and pull it off. It leaves a large hole in my foot. I take another coral-looking thing off. There are giant blue microorganisms the size of my fist underneath, moving and squirming around--reaching their tentacles out to explore the world. There are also large, soft, gray chunks in the hole in my foot. My cat starts to sniff the organism, and I'm really scared for her, so I shoo her away and bag the organism to throw it all away someplace safe. The back of my foot looks like an empty leather sack.
INTERPRETATION
Hmmm. Well, I think that when I was in my twenties, and even in my teens (call Chris Hansen and send him back in time), I would feel considerably more powerful and desirable, sexually, than the middle aged men who would constantly approach me (in the dream, I was clothed in the incredible red dress). Unless they really kept themselves unusually fit and healthy for their age (and weren't married or in a relationship, which they often were), it always felt so outrageous for someone of about 40-60 years of age to approach me, sexually, at my young age. But I don't feel dramatically mismatched with single, middle aged people anymore at my age and in my condition! I feel kind of gross, really (like the infected, leather foot in the dream). And my health is only fair.
This is just a dream digging into the subconscious though. I think that in real life, it's good to have enough self-esteem to ask out someone you're interested in, even if they're intimidating for whatever reason. Plenty of relationships with an age gap work out fine. But I would just challenge certain people to ask why they think they should be with someone dramatically younger or very unevenly matched. Are they trying to make their romantic partners status symbols? Do they believe that having a more youthful partner would boost their self-esteem for a while? That's not a recipe for happiness for either person.
